What do you call a grown boy scout


Well if he’s always wearing the same uniform he did when he was six, you simply call him creepy, but that is way off topic.

If I knew just two, stereotypical, borderline sexist facts about boy and girl scouts, and I do, and I didn’t know anything else, and I don’t, it would be that boy scouts always be prepared and girl scouts learn the importance of consumerism at an early age by selling delicious cookies.

And since boy scouts always be prepared, they have money and an appetite and buy all the girl scout cookies making girls rich and boys fat. Proving once and for all that girls are taught early on how to manipulate men.

But this story is about a modern day version of a boy scout, the snow plow man. Yep, snow plow man be like, prepared. (What? The geek can enjoy memes.) They are so prepared sometimes they aren’t even needed,

This morning I headed towards northern Oklahoma where my Fiancee resides. And then we would head farther north into southern Kansas where we would be attending church. Last night a snow storm did come through the area which inevitably meant, my city got none of it.

This didn’t stop my counties snow trucks to line the highways waiting for weather that wasn’t coming. Before I got out of my county I saw no less than 4 snow plow trucks waiting to go to work. That is prepared.

OK, so I exaggerate a little because yes, there was SNOW in the northern part of my county including the last place I saw two plows sitting around. No really, I have proof of the blistery winter weather.

20130324_080604

See that snow there? That’s what they were waiting for and now theses modern day old men boy scouts can get to work.

Are you telling me you’re one of the skeptics saying there is no snow in that photo? Well I’m sorry you’d be mistaken. Look, right there, closer… don’t you see it? Let me help a little, do you see all that fog in the distance? Well that’s not fog, that is the snow. A very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, moderately small set of snow flakes being blown around in the crazy Oklahoma wind we are known for.

Yep, good thing those Snow Plow guys lined the road in my county or I may have never made it to the next one. Money well spent government, money well spent.

Of course, when I think prepared I think of only one word, STUMPFF!

Haven’t heard of Stumpff? You are missing out on the world preparedness my friend.

In the city where I was headed there is a business called ‘Stumpff Realty.’ They help you get a house, that is how prepared they are. They help prepare YOU for the rest of your life.

“Oh but GGR there are lots of Realtors in the world, that’s not very prepared.”

That’s where Stumpff got smart, they also own Stumpff Insurance agency. See they sold you a house and now they are helping prepare you in the case of damage to your home.

“Ok GGR, that’s PRETTY prepared, but the NAME in preparedness, not quite.”

True, BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE! After your life ends you can go right down the street to Stumpff Funeral Home. Yep, they prepare you for the afterlife as well. And just how prepared are they for that event? Well don’t forget that they covered your life insurance with Stumpff and then your family can also sell your house with Stumpff.

They prepare you for life and then take care of you when it’s gone. That’s prepared.

So take some advice from all of these people and the scouts, be prepared and eat lots of cookies.

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “What do you call a grown boy scout

    1. Good Geek Ranting Post author

      See, I hadn’t even thought of the popcorn. I didn’t remember it. Why? No one does. Who sells popcorn to raise money? Are we training then to work at fairs and carnivals? Popcorn doesn’t sell like cookies.
      No one has ever said, “take this bag of popcorn away before I eat the whole thing” because you’re SUPPOSED to eat the whole thing.
      And no one has ever gone to overeaters anonymous because they have an addiction to popcorn.

      And the end about eating cookies was a call back to the beginning about the boy scouts buying all the girl scouts cookies. Now I know the real reason, because all they have is popcorn and cans of beans heated over fires.

      Ok, that’s my second scout rant today, I’m off to bed

      Reply

You got something to say? Let's hear it!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s