A friend of mine inspired this. I know all bloggers get some weird search terms and, honestly, most of mine aren’t that weird. But I DID think, what a unique opportunity for me. You, the people, are searching for answers and you have given me the questions. So I should answer them for you.
So here you go, 101, a relatively small selection of my search terms with proper responses to each.
1 chris hemsworth – Yes this is how most of you found me. He really IS too good looking.
2 zooey deschanel sister – Her name is Emily.
3 natalie portman thor – After meeting Christ Hemsworth she probably is.
4 chris hemsworth pictures – No more please.
5 geeky adult onesies – Even geeks shouldn’t wear them.
6 onesies for teenage girls – Little girl, please don’t give up this early in life.
7 plain looking – It’s ok, we’re all beautiful in God’s eyes.
8 good geek ranting – You’ve heard of me?
9 zooey deschanel nerdy love – Sweet sweet nerdy love indeed.
10 tailgate snuggie – Snuggies are for the game in the stands, Onesies are apparently for tailgating.
11 snuggie onesie – These are two different things, if you’re going to give up on life, please learn the difference.
12 zooey deschanel gorgeous – Yes, yes she is.
13 natalie portman in thor – I think you’ve got that backwards.
14 cool adult onesies – there are none.
15 average looking man – I’m 6’4, overweight with a goatee. Trust me, I’m not average.
16 body quivers – lets keep this PG-13 at least.
17 ninja businessman – Are you hiring?
18 r2d2 front – What, you got something against R2’s butt?
19 big bang theory emily – No regular cast member or character on BBT is named Emily. You have shamed the geek community and must now leave the island.
20 what’s a onesie – It’s a single piece of fabric designed to cover an entire body. Most commonly seen on babies though a new fad has emerged of adults buying them.
21 zooey deschanel hot scene – Where where where?
22 r2d2 dimensions – Well, he’s about yay tall and about this big around.
23 geeky onesies for adults – just stop people.
24 beep boop beep star wars – boop beep whistle buzz can’t wait.
25 zooey deschanel and sister – havne’t seen them today.
26 how to the whole cast of finding nemo – this is not a complete question but you have my curiosity.
27 lazy superman – he is NOT!
28 clever ecards – eCards are a passing fad and in 50 years we will realize that none of them were actually clever.
29 snuggies for onesies – You’re so confused. Please stop drinking at 3 AM.
30 r2-d2 tablet wallpaper – This is not the droid wallpaper you’re looking for.
31 poular bathroomt with computer – please use BOTH hands when typing…… after you wash them.
32 goodgeekranting – Still am. And still surprised you’re searching for me.
33 tie fighter blu print – Just because I’m building a full size working replica of a Tie Fighter doesn’t mean you can have my blue prints.
34 r2d2 phone – R2 doesn’t need a phone, he is always connected.
35 grown up women onesie – It’s not as sexy as they make it out to be.
36 3d salesman – There are 2d Salesmen?
37 finding nemo quotes – Ok, how about ‘Just keep swimming’
38 the big happy adult onesie – if You’re a happy adult you probably don’t need a onesie.
39 adult double onesie – what are the two of you going to be doing in the onesie? Wait, don’t tell me, I don’t want to know.
40 zooey deschanel body – I do not have a full sized robotic reproduction of Zooey’s body.
41 zoey deschanel pantyhose – Fiancee made me get rid of them. Sorry.
42 typical man – far from it.
43 zooey deschanel blanket – If you have an extra one sure… errr, fiancee is watching… I mean. NO SIR I don’t want one of those. (Leave it in my car.)
44 zooey deschanel no emotion – Do you know who you’re talking about? I think you mean Emily from Bones.
45 beauty and the beat disney – The remix version.
46 snuggie superman – A superman snuggie? Well you have gone all geek on me.
47 rd-d2 action figure – can’t have mine, sorry. Go to wal mart.
48 zooey deschanel’s sister – her name is EMILY!
49 the mentalist emily deschanel – Emily is not the Mentalist. The Mentalist isn’t even female.
50 please forgive me gif – of course I forgive you.
51 if you cannot forgive me – I just did, it’s no biggie just get your facts straight.
52 natalie portman plain looking – ummmm no.
53 chocolate covered stress – wait what?
54 bacon geek – you have come to the right place my friend.
55 bathroom read – go ahead, I also have a book you can get on Kindle.
56 are adult onesies cool – no. No they are not.
57 snowboarding onesie – ok now you are all just being ridiculous.
58 amy in big bang theory gorgeous – I think so. But then I always had a crush on Blossom.
59 note for titanic – WATCH OUT FOR ICEBERGS!
60 losvu – slkdfj
61 adult gaming onesie – What kind of adult games?
62 8-bit bathroom – Not practical. Think of the sharp edges on the toilet.
63 sexy girls onesie – this is the best oxymoron ever.
64 one direction onesies for adults – so sad, yet still proud to have so many UK fans.
65 astromech skin – What are you going to do with it? Are you one of those weirdos who wears the skins of astromechs?
66 sitcom – how did your vague vague search term end up here?
67 https://goodgeekranting.wordpress.com/2012/01/26/torrid-love-triangle-with-the-deschanel-sisters/ – This is the search bar, you want to put this in the address bar at the top of the window. And, btw, what a very specific search. Sitcom guy could learn from you.
68 computer repair girl standing – ATTN: All computer repair girls (All 2 of you?) – please stay away from that house.
69 someecards about being vain – Look, you obviously don’t like her so just tell her face to face and get it over with. eCard breakups are so last year.
70 the word high class – ahem… that’s two words.
71 look at my new drivers license picture – I don’t even know you… oh alright… hey not bad.
72 zooey channel – her last name is spelled Deschanel. Unless you were talking about an all Zooey channel in which case, I’m in.
73 you can forgive me – I really already did but I’m starting to reconsider.
74 forgive me cartoon – Now you’ve made a cartoon? You’re trying to hard, what else did you do?
75 emily deschanel wedding zooey – ummm, that’s incest. So best to go to the south.
76 wonder woman adult onesie – More like, I wonder why this woman is wearing a onesie.
77 thor looking horse – and the horse is looking thor… HA It really never gets old.
78 is seth macfarlane in lg spectrum – LG Spectrum is a phone. Seth Macfarlane is a full sized person. Your phone is not possessed by Seth.
79 thor look alike – no but I bet my Fiancee wouldn’t mind if I did.
80 dude my r2d2 i haven’t played this is years – I KNOW RIGHT!
81 how to make a sock puppet of poor man – if you’re making a sock puppet, you’re already a poor man.
82 bridal adult onesie – Now you’re all just messing with me, right?
83 emily zooey tongue – ummmmm. wrong website.
84 sad girl in onesie – if she’s in a onesie, probably so cause she’s certainly not out on a date.
85 vic 20 cassettes – they are just regular audio cassettes, no special cassettes needed. Though finding audio cassettes isn’t always easy these days either.
86 geek “notify me of follow-up comments” – I would but you didn’t leave me your email addy.
87 wendys breakfast games – ummm, there’s a game?
88 black lab onsie – this is just cruel punishment to the dog. Sure he chewed your couch and your remote and your game controllers but he doesn’t deserve to wear a misspelled onesie.
89 when your significant other moves in – your dignity moves out.
90 businessman feel sorry – none that I’ve met.
91 schools out5 for summer – not yet, and is the random 5 code for a summer gang?
92 bad looking men with good looking women – what are you saying?
93 dr horrible quote – how about ‘What a crazy random happenstance.’
94 i’m so sorry please forgive me – I’m beginning to consider otherwise.
95 you can’t forgive me – I’ve tried NUMEROUS TIMES!
96 phil phillips does your daddy let you date – little girl, (or boy, I don’t discriminate) when you type a name into google it doesn’t send that person a message.
97 deschanel love triangle good geek writing – I thought it was too, thanks.
98 ninja romance – It’s hard to love a ninja and worst of all, you never see their love coming.
99 toilet ecards – your friends are weird.
100 list of sitcom cookie-cutter scenarios – kid gets in trouble, people make fun of it, everyone learns a lesson.
101 emily elbert’s boyfriend – I don’t know who he is but it’s apparently not you so we’ve narrowed down the list.